Learn about sensual dreams and how you deal with eros in your life. The creative life is also a form of Eros. How you deal with relationships will give insight into dealing with the loves of your life including your creative endeavours.
Sensual and Sexual Dreams
Gayle Delaney- Sensual Dreaming
Freud worked during the time of great sexual repression. He viewed many of his client’s dreams as being sexual in nature. He came up with theories such as penis envy and the Oedipus complex- where little boys really wanted to sleep with their mothers and kill their fathers and vice-versa for little girls.
He related all sorts of symbols- cigars, towering buildings as representing the penis in dreams. This viewpoint, although possibly a good counter viewpoint to the sexual repression of the time, does not seem particularly relevant today.
But of course we still do dream of relationships and sex.
We dream of sex because:
- Wish fulfillment
- Gives us ideas on how to add creativity and juice to our relationships.
- Helps us see that how we are in life is how we are in sensual relationships and vice-versa i.e. dominating, passive, angry etc.
- Gives clues to whether our relationship is working on various levels, as how we are sexually is how we are in other domains of the relationship.
- Helps remind us how we used to feel, and how we can feel again, by evoking powerful feelings.
Sexual dreams go much further than fantasies and show us where we have sexual and emotional conflict. For example: dreams of being coerced to have sex may signal deep conflict, guilt and possibly abuse. According to Delaney these dreams show us how we are in trouble, how we got there and how to work our way out of our difficulties.
We will look at some common sexual dream themes and how to interpret them.
Sensual dream work allows us to understand the effects of early conditioning and current conflicts in our sexual life. Delaney says- pg. 15, Sensual Dreaming- Erotic dreams can show us what we really want, what we have been missing and what we may already have without realizing it.”
The reward for being honest about sexual content in dreams we may shed fears and misconceptions and help unveil secrecy and shame that limits our enjoyment and encourages destructive sexual behavior.
Working with sexual dreams gives you direct access to past experience, beliefs, attitudes and feelings that show you feel about yourself, your sexuality and how you choose and relate to your partners.
The first step is to increase our comfort in thinking and talking about sexual dreams.
Romance:
The emphasis on romance and emotional connection in sexual dreams is common with women.—often involves feeling deeply understood, accepted and loved.
Dreams of the Woman in Control–
Helps women become more aware of her own desire, and can be metaphors for the woman’s desire to take more control of her life in general and her relationship.
Plenty of Time Dreams–
Very relaxing and stimulating to women. The opposite feeling of being rushed is almost always a dream turn-off for women.
Famous or Unknown Lovers–
Depends upon what the dreamer thinks and feels about the famous dream lover. Often reminds her of someone in her waking life. Or can serve as an ego boost to be wanted by someone so high profile.
Women With Women
Once in a while about a repressed attraction, more commonly a desire to assimilate a quality, become like, or be accepted by the woman in her dreams.
Nakedness:
Often relate to feeling exposed or vulnerable. (Often anxiety and fear of revealing self).
- What was the setting of my nakedness like?
- How did I feel being naked?- If it is naked and exposed-
- Do the setting and thoughts and feelings associated with it remind me of any situation at the time in which I felt (embarrassed or uncomfortable exposure?)
Forceful Men Dreams
Often the dreamer feels anxiety and terror- may bring up conflicts in the dreamer.
Violence and Threat– When dreamers feel forced, threatened or obliged to have sex with someone- and when that someone is a brother, father, or family member the dreamer usually wakes up upset.
The dreamer may discover she feels “screwed” at work, or even remembering sexual abuse from childhood.
Dreams of being cornered by big male spiders, crazy men and vampires are in this genre.
Sex with Undesirable Partners– 2 varieties
- Unpleasant sex with a former husband or old boyfriend
- Sex with a person the dreamer does not find attractive.
Embarrassment, Pain and Repulsion
This may be about embarrassment by one’s own body odors or looks, or being coerced to engage in acts they find painful, unpleasant or repulsive.
*A dream of this genre is also when having a nice time in bed and in walks mom, dad or a spouse. In these dreams the intruder often represents attitudes felt by the dreamer. It is these feelings that often keep the dreamer from feeling adult or free with her lover.
What Women Can Learn From Their Dreams–
Dreams of an old lover that is a better lover than the current one can remind us that something is missing in one’s relationship.
Dreams of fantastic lovemaking might help the dreamer let go of self-consciousness.
If dream content opens up memories of abuse, or reawakens abuse issues that are not resolved, working with a therapist might be an option.
Men can learn a lot about their partner through dream work- issues that arise before we can recognize and talk about them in waking state. Practical issues like rushing the lovemaking, or being angry- as a gorilla will be demonstrated in dreams. If a man knows how to listen to his partner’s dreams with openness she will feel safe enough to include him as she explores emotional and interpersonal conflicts.
A man who studies women’s dreams can become the kind of tuned in lover most women prize.
Men’s sexual dreams.
In contrast, men will describe their favorite sexual dreams in terms of the unexpected, the daring and the highly erotic. – Whereas women like the romantic and timeless.
Men seem to dream differently in that they like being with women who are accessible, easily turned on and daring.
There are far fewer men’s dreams to draw from, as they are much less likely to be in dream groups and talk about their dream content.
Men’s dreams- Common themes.
- Eager, available women.
- Sex in Public
- Romance- “being wanted by her is most pleasurable”.
Former Lovers–
Fewer men than women dream erotically of former lovers. Early research suggests women dream more often of familiar figures, men more frequently of strangers.
Being Seduced by Older Women– For men this is often a good dream. The women are rarely coercive or pushy, but they are seductive and skilled.
Erotic Sensuality– Research is suggesting the new generation of men might be more interested in foreplay and sensuality than their fathers.
Men With Men–
Unlike heterosexual women, heterosexual men rarely have pleasant erotic dreams with other men.- This could just represent the uncomfortableness men have with admitting this type of dream.
Men are much less likely to admit to sexually unpleasant dreams. Some of the more negative themes that might emerge are:
*My ex-wife has sex with someone else.
*I am having sex with a woman and she turns into a man.
*Being abandoned or humiliated when I am sexually intimate with a woman.
*Wanting to stop having sex with someone I don’t desire and not knowing how to get out of it.
*The woman I want is always out of reach.
*Being interrupted by my mom.
What Women Can Learn From Men’s Dreams?
How much our sexual inhibitions distress men. We can learn about what men really want and how to give it to them by understanding their personal dreams.
Remember- we all have shocking sexual dreams. What they mean is determined by a personal interview.
What goes on in bed may reflect the dynamics of your relationship. Delaney says lovers who are generous, exuberant and creative in bed will have a different relationship than do lovers who are selfish, passive or critical.
Looking back on your major relationships- Did the qualities of what went on in the bedroom mirror what was going on emotionally? This may be easier to figure out when you are no longer in the relationship.
Early warning signs. Pick any relationship that did not work. Think about how and why it ended. Go back to the first week or month of that relationship and recall what signs your lover provided early on that foreshadowed major problems.
Eg. Workaholics would show you that they were obsessed by their jobs. Alcoholics drink too much. Chatterboxes talk a lot. Know it alls would control, wimps wimp out, complainers complain and selfish lovers make love as if you haven’t any needs. Pg. 102 Sensual Dreaming.
Our personality is expressed in our sexual interactions.
Men who complain about their partners being inhibited in bed often say they ended the relationship because these women are also unwilling to try new foods, and new activities.
Excessively dependent people may prefer to be hugged and cuddled then involved in sex.
Controlling people may be unwilling to let the other take sexual initiative, or conversely want to be dominated, but only in a way they permit.
If someone is irresponsible in bed, you will have other problems with them taking responsibility in their lives as well.
Conflicts of goals or style also show up- one wants children the other doesn’t. When awake we tend to think we can shape the person into Mr. Right. Dreams often give us the truth, even in the beginning when we don’t want to look.
Delaney also warns that if one person claims more status in the relationship due to money, job, etc. the lower status partner will sometimes silently and secretly build up resentments. This may also just be men and women taking on gender-specific jobs. These resentments creep into bed with the couple. Attraction and interest turn to feelings of dominance, control, and submission resentment and sometimes revenge. Pg. 106
Exercise 6-3 pg. 108-109 Sensual Dreaming- Gayle Delaney
When you are having sex with your partner is he or she warm and generous or reluctant and passive? Is your partner demanding and threatening? How about you? Are you exuberant, creative, generous, open, distant, resentful or frightened?
What adjectives did you use? Have you just described the quality of your entire relationship? If you see no parallel between your relationship in bed and the overall relationship, write a few lines describing how the two relationships are different. Then look for aspects of your current relationship that, in spite of the differences, do match our descriptive adjectives. In doing so, you may be surprised to find parallels you had not noticed before.
How did you feel in bed with your most recent major lover? Did you feel wanted sexually, loved celebrated, serviced, tolerated, resented?
Does this description remind you of how you felt in any other relationships? Most people find that the core emotional feelings that surrounded their last major sexual relationship were not only the same in and out of bed, but were present in most of their past relationships and are often present in their current ones. This usually comes as a bit of a shock. Yet once you begin to recognize your relational patterns, you wonder how you could have failed to notice them for so long.
When was the first time you felt this way in relationship to anyone in your life? If you find yourself saying that you felt similarly loved, ignored, used and so forth by your mother, father, grandparent etc. don’t be alarmed. You are not alone.
It is common to choose major emotional entanglements with people whose emotional style resembles that of someone from whom you first learned to relate.
These patterns are often very hard to break.
We recreate patterns to try to find love and approval we either missed or received from a parent with others who share their traits. —It is said that if we grow up wanting blood from a stone, we get the idea it is the stone we want.
Choosing partners who are like your mom or dad works reasonably well if those parental relationships were good. IF they were troubled, your own romance may reflect these same troubles.
Or we choose polar opposites. This can start out as a refreshing change, but eventually you may feel unfulfilled, and unable to cope with this different pattern.
A choice based on greater self-knowledge, understanding of the forces and archetypes that shaped your needs and attractions and clarity and courage to know when to end something that is harmful.
Dreams, of course, keep commenting on how to choose a partner, how the relationship is going and how to resolve the conflict.
Dreams of addiction to emotional states and behaviors.
Habitual reactions of tearfulness, moodiness, or anger might be used to manipulate others and to avoid painful feelings underneath.
These painful feelings could be fear, (of abandonment, rejection), inferiority, dependency or rage.
We might be addicted to soothing someone angry and our sexuality may have diminished due to this.
Rescuers of people with addictions get a sense of purpose or self-esteem by sticking with dependent partners. This may help them avoid facing their own loneliness, depression etc. If you choose partners who need rescuing you may understand co-dependency.
Fused Relationships–
Too much merging. No I and Thou. This feeling forms some part of most relationships. Dreams of making love you are a little girl or boy, and your partner is your parent Dreams of having sex with a friendly sibling, or an immature friend.
Domination/ Submission
For those who grew up thinking we have to earn or buy love from others. The response can be to submit to sex and inappropriate demands from partners and friends to win love and affection. The dreamer may have learned that if they do not meet others demands terrible abuse or punishment might result, or affection or love would be withheld.
Dreams of having sex to escape bodily harm or death.
Dreams of Affairs or Cheating–
If you dream about wanting to have sex with someone other than your partner-
Obtain a good description and bridge to the dream lover.
Assess how you feel about accepting or declining the offer.
If you awaken relieved to escape the encounter. It is a warning to resist the sexual attraction, or whatever the relationship, activity or attitude you bridged the dream lover to. If you awaken sad to have missed the opportunity, describe, and bridge to that situation.
If you go ahead with your infidelity in the dream, pay close attention to how you feel doing so, and how the dream drama develops. Was the sex satisfying?
Were there interruptions or painful consequences? IF things go badly, or if you awake frightened of having made a terrible mistake, ask yourself if you are on the verge of threatening your primary relationship by getting overly involved.
If things go well, as yourself if moving closer to the person or attitude or aspect of yourself or your partner to which you have bridged the dream lover would be a good and enriching thing to do in waking life.
Dreams of Sexual Abuse-
About 1 in 3 or 4 girls and 1 in 9 boys have been sexually abused, often by family members or family friends or associates. This information commonly shows up in dreams. Survivors of sexual abuse are generally more depressed, anxious, disassociated, somatize and have more sexual dysfunction. They may be more prone to addictions. They have more sleep disturbances and twice as many nightmares and repetitive nightmares. If the abuse is incest there is more misfortune in their dreams and they tend to confuse sex and aggression while dreaming.
The following type dream themes point to abuse, it does not prove it. Also, the abuse may be neglect or violent, rather than sexual.
Dreams of someone holding a gun to their vagina, being tied up and raped, and vampires are common. Also, sometimes the women dream of being a little boy- (a safer position), or of seeing a little boy molested. Also, young animals. Being held prisoner or hostage might also be a dream theme of this type. Young men abused by their mothers might dream of mother spiders, scorpions or beetles.
Working through the abuse issues with dream therapy, journaling, psychologists or abuse groups will give the survivor a chance to break the cycle of abusive relationships and romances.
In these cases either therapy or joining a group for survivors of abuse may be healing. Even revealing the event in dream therapy, may initially feel worse, but helps people on the path to healing.
Gayle Delaney tells all of us that we can break out of limiting patterns in relationships and clear the way for intimacy.
She says the steps are: Sensual Dreaming pg.s 188-
Self-education- to help approach sexuality as a growing, changing, creative act. – Read one to two books per year.
Identify your patterns- You can learn a great deal about your self-image and patterns in relationships from the history of your sexual relationships. What kinds of relationships have you been in and, how did you see yourself in each one?
Review the History of Your Sexual Relationships.
Make a list of every major lover you have had, or have longed for. Describe briefly the dynamics of each relationship. Did you and your partner play any roles such as rescuer/rescuee or substance abuser/co-dependent placatory?
Did you scold or comfort an adult partner who acted like a dependent child?
Was your relationship based on sibling rivalry, fusion, mutual support, one-sided support, domination and submission, or endless struggles for power?
Was one of you an intimacy junkie and the other a distance taker?
If you recognize the roles you played, you might be able to recognize roles in your current relationships and choose whether to continue them or change them.
Describe the emotional patterns in your parent’s relationship and what might have been the characteristics of their sexual lives. Were they affectionate, was one constantly criticizing or bullying? Have you re-created a similar role in your relationship or attracted a polar opposite relationship?
Incubate a dream to ask for help in recognizing and breaking negative patterns. What would be a good step in improving my romantic relationship? What limiting patterns am I reenacting in my current relationship?
Self Esteem is such a big part of relationships. We will have a better chance to attract someone healthy if we are emotionally healthy.
Incubate a dream on Your Self-Esteem
What is the major block to me having high self-esteem?
What best first step could I take to improve my self-esteem?
In many cases, people are afraid of intimacy and have patterns that are self-sabotaging.
Some self-sabotage patterns according to Delaney are:
- Avoiding intimacy.
- Picking people who we know will not give us the love we want.
- Co-operating with your partner to neglect the active involvement it takes to maintain a vibrant, loving relationship. When we take a relationship for granted too long it might lose its vitality.
Incubating a Dream About the Dragon in Your Relationship? pg. 206 Delaney- Sensual Dreaming.
Why do I keep picking partners who are__________?
What keeps me from enjoying my sexuality or my partner as much as I might?
What am I afraid of?
How can I feel safe in a relationship?
Why do I have so little interest in sex with______?
What can I do to improve my sexual relationship?
What can I do to maintain or revive my relationship?
Dream Themes- Find Chart-Dream Classes- Dream Chart.
Common Dream Theme’s Chart
Gayle Delaney- In your dreams. Jung, Freud. Aizenstat
Aging-
Can have some fear of death. May help us grow up and accept the ageing process and transitions from one stage to another. White hair, having cancer, losing beauty, sagging skin. Describe the indications of ageing. How do you feel in the dream about this ageing? Why do you care? Are you more worried about losing your youth than you recognized? What role does your concern about ageing play in your major relationships and in your sense of yourself both at work and at home?
Animal- What state is it in, healthy, aggressive,
Neglected-
Get a careful description of the babies and animals and their condition. How do you feel about the animal in the dream? If it’s a cat, what are cats like? Do you like them? Why or why not? What is the cat in the dream like? What is its personality? Is there any part of yourself or anyone else that is like this?
What traits does it have? How is it being treated? How do you feel seeing this animal/baby? Is there any part of you that is feeling or being treated that way in waking life? How severely mistreated or neglected are these animals or babies? Do they need professional help to effect the healing? What may have triggered this dream?
Being Chased-
Often with a gun or knife. What are we are running from in our lives? Get a description of the pursuer, and the feeling associated with being pursued. What does the pursuer want? What are you avoiding?
Avoidance/Scared Protection-
Being Lost-
Can occur in any setting- forest, urban, in a storm. You may call out for help, or not be able to find your way home. Dreamers usually feel sad, frightened, disoriented.
Freud- lost in everyday life, no sense of direction regarding career, purpose or spiritual sense. You may feel unable to form relationships. Do not ignore these dreams. Delaney pg. 75 they can offer the dreamer a chance to identify a core feeling that colors most of their waking experience. The dreams may carry clues about why the dreamer is lost and offer a chance to make changes.
Describe the scene in which you are lost in your dream. How does it feel to be lost? Is there anywhere in your life you have experienced these same feelings? What do you think you might do to remedy this situation?
Being Naked in Public-
Often relates to feeling exposed or found out.
Where in your life are you feeling uncomfortable about being exposed? Feeling Exposed, Vulnerable, Shameful,
Being Unprepared for an Exam–
What test in your actual daily life are you underprepared for? What kind of challenge are you being confronted with? What goes wrong in the dream- ill-prepared, illegible exam? Do you know why you are unprepared?
Are you overly perfectionistic in these situations? What might you do now to get better prepared?
Being Pregnant or Having a Baby– To Support & Nurture-
What is new and developing in your life? What new project, relationship, or idea are you giving birth to? What is it like to be pregnant? How long have you been pregnant? What in your life has been growing for——3 months? Do you feel like you are giving birth to something new?
Car Dreams_
Jung says it’s about how the dreamer moves forward in time and lives his psychological life. Are we living on borrowed time? ($). Does our car match our personality? Or are we trying to live someone else’s? Freud suggests it could symbolize the dreamer’s body. Headlights eyes,
Delaney notices the year make and condition of the car symbolize a particular time in the dreamer’s life in which certain emotionally charged events occur.
Does the person have a difficult time getting the car started? Does the car keep stalling, or is the driver reckless or out of control? Is the car really showy- and needs to be shown off?
Are we a passenger, or in the back seat? – In this case, the car can symbolize a relationship. How is the driver driving? (Careless, careful etc.) Who is in control of the relationship, and how does the person feel about it? Or an unrecognized part of one’s personality can be driving.
Dying in Dreams:
Often a real red- flag pointing to something being wrong. Find out how the dying is occurring? i.e. if the person is shooting themselves in the head- ask whether this is generally a good idea.
Why are you dying, being killed or executed in your dream? Describe the thing, agent, or person that is killing you. Is there anything, any of your behaviors, or anyone in your life that is threatening your well being, that fits this description? It could be a part of the dreamer’s personality dying, a relationship may be threatened, or someone may really be grieving and processing the loss of someone who has passed on. Discovering a fuller sense of life or self.
Falling–
Jung- fear of losing status, losing control. People with depression use these dreams as a signal of recurrence.
What is going on just before the fall? What precipitated the fall? How do you feel as you fall? Is there any situation in your life where you feel or fear feeling the way you do in your dream? Is there any situation in your life that is like the scene precedes the fall in your dream? If so can you see how the dream action__________ preceding the fall describes self-defeating or self-destructive behaviors in your life?
Flying–
What is it like when you fly? How do you feel when you fly? Do you have trouble getting or maintaining your altitude? When was the last time in waking life that you felt as you do in the dream?
If there are obstacles to the flight-
Are there any obstacles or concerns? What if any are the obstacles- (doubt, attitudes, etc)? If so describe the person, feeling or insecurity inhibiting your flight. Is there anyone or anything in your life that is causing you trouble? Does the way you use flight in your dream similar to how you cope with situations in your waking life?
House- discovering new rooms.
Freud saw houses as representing bodies. Jung- dreamer’s lifestyle, marriage, emotional state, time in a person’s life indicated by the period of time the dreamer lived there.
Discovering new parts of themselves, new potentials. More rooms- more potential- are they beautiful, or fixer-uppers? Describe the house. Does it remind you of any particular house in your life? Describe the new room you discover. Does it have a purpose? How do you feel about it? Are you discovering new parts of yourself that you would describe as……?
Child Hood Home- Issues in your life that were active or began during the period you lived there. Childhood and parental issues you carry into adult life.
Describe the home in your dream. What was your life like and how did you feel then? What was it like to be back in the home in the dream? Do these feelings remind you of anything in your current life? How so?
Losing Your Teeth:
Something of value is being lost. Losing power, losing face. Sometimes part of ageing, or life-stage transition.
What’s wrong with having your teeth fall out? Which teeth fell out? What precipitated it? How do you feel about this? Do these feeling remind you of any recent situations in your life?
Losing Your Wallet-, Purse or ID
Feeling concerned, panicky. Freud- purse as womb. Losing one, like losing one’s virginity. Jungians- loss of identity and power (credit cards, id, and $).
Often come up when people retire or step into a new phase of life. People are unclear about what to do next and about their role in life.
(Is there anywhere in life where you have trouble proving who you are, that you don’t have money or credit cards?) How do you feel when your purse is lost or stolen? Is there anywhere in your life you feel this way?
Making Decisions in Dreams:
You may decide to call off a relationship, go on a trip, or anything else. Yet decisions made in dreams may have poor outcomes. Don’t think that just because you decide something in dream state you should emulate it in reality.
Take pause……..what is the outcome? Are you in the process of making an unwise decision?
Describe the decision you do make in your dream. What action or event led you to make that decision? How wise is your decision in the context of the dream? How wise is the decision in your waking life? Has your dream opened your eyes to something?
Making Love- with someone unexpected
Freud- Disguised desire to have sex with someone forbidden- parent, same-sex etc.
Jung- making love to one’s anima, or animus- (part of one’s soul) to gain more knowledge of that piece.
Gestalt- making love to a certain part of yourself you are getting to know- can be pleasant or unpleasant.
Always describe the personality of the dream lover and the quality of the dream encounter. Look for matches in walking life. It can be about taking on characteristics of people we would like to emulate. It’s an alchemical experience of “being in bed” with another- integrating some of who they are, or what they represent.
Dreams of sleeping with one’s ex might arise if one is dating someone who has similar characteristics that we are consciously unaware of. (Does this person remind you of anyone in your current life? Does this remind you of the dynamics of a current or past relationship?) (Delaney pg. 45 – In Your Dreams.)
Coercion or rape in dreams usually indicates this feeling exists somewhere in the client’s life.
Missing a Plane, Boat, Car Ride etc.-
Often relates to missed opportunities; and hurried, rushed lives. What might you be missing the boat on? Anxiety, fear, guilt that hold people back. Disappointment- rushing, hectic. How do you feel about missing your plane, train, boat or bus? Do you know why in the dream you are missing your —-? Do you see any parallels between the cause of you missing the dream vehicle and any attitudes, behaviors, or circumstances in your life? Does what cause you to miss the boat in your dream cause you to miss the boat in life? Do you have trouble getting where you want to go because you are always too (rushed, burdened, distracted, unprepared)? What might you do to remedy the situation?
Money or valuables- Finding it-
Often about new and positive qualities in oneself. Describe the money or valuables you found. Where do you find them? Is there anything in your life like the money or valuables that you find in your dream? Does the place you find your treasure suggest any area of your life that holds riches or opportunity for you? Describe the similarities between your dream valuables and the strengths, skills or opportunities you think they represent. Why do you think you had this dream at this particular time in your life?
Storms:
How close is the storm? How threatening? What is your feeling or advice? Are you or others listening to this advice? Do you have time to get to safety? Who is involved? Where in your life does it feel like__________?
What can you do about it? Is it something you can control, or need to get away from?
Trying to Find a Private Toilet:
Why do humans go to the bathroom? What is uncomfortable about doing it in public? How do you feel in the dream? Is there a feeling in your life where you feel as if you haven’t the privacy to relieve yourself?
How so?
Overall dreams about going to the bathroom are enjoyed by dream workers, as they get to the truth of how you are feeling quite quickly, in a very earthy manner.
Water Dreams–
Describe the particular water- cold, warm, – what is your relation to it? – floating, drowning, Describe the water in your dream? Are you swimming, washing, drowning etc? How do you feel in the dram? Is there anywhere in your life where you feel like you are drowning?
War–
We can be a soldier, or a victim. It can symbolize conflict between attitude, desire or beliefs within the dreamer, says Jung. It can also be conflict in a relationship.
Describe the exact nature of the warfare. How do you feel during this? Is there any situation in your life now, or in your past, where you feel the same way you do in the dream? Are you having a similar conflict, or do you remember past conflict with your family, battles between your parents, or conflict in your life now, between you and your spouse, your friends, and your co-workers?
Is there anything going on in your life right now that is like the war in your dream.
If the enemy is identified in the dream- describe their personality, goal and motivation. Is there anyone in your life or any force in your life that fits the description of your dream enemy? Is the way the war being conducted similar to how you are conducting the conflict in your life? If so, would you like to and can you change that warfare?