When the Going Gets Tough

Gini says, “Obtaining your wishes is not a linear process. There will be ups and downs. Learning to help yourself during a down phase, makes the difference between having your wish fulfilled or failing. In the next sections, you will learn ways to problem solve during a backslide or if you are ever recaptured. Either way, you can get back out of the lantern. Free genies stay free because they know these techniques.”

What you do is the purest definition of your value system.  Nassim Taleb- Book Skin in the Game

Genie Lesson # 83

Don’t let a Slip Up Derail You for Long; Face Your Problems

When making and claiming wishes, you may encounter challenges. Backslides are common. After a huge breakthrough or big lifestyle change, you often see results. But, sometimes when the threat of loss is removed, one can lapse back into self-defeating beliefs, behaviours or addictions.

Stay aware over time as you work with your inner polarities, where the mischief or pain is most apparent. It is easier to maintain new changes if you stay focused. Instead of falling into patterns of shame or hiding, be honest and compassionate and face your difficulty head-on.

See and face setbacks when they occur rather than ignore them, says Lolly Daskal, president of Lead from Within. This powerful and clear stance will help manifest goals. Denying or hiding from problems often causes future issues and delays. Having your wishes come true takes work, but you are building your dreams, and living out your soul purpose.

Genie Lesson # 84 

Recognize and Stop Backslides

If you catch a backslide early, it is easier to maintain gains.

Recognize the signs of a slide. For example, a simple behaviour to look at is weight gain, as results are easy to measure. Let’s say my goal is to lose 10 pounds and keep it off. When I notice my clothes are tighter, and I am 5 pounds heavier than my optimum weight, I have concrete proof of a backslide.

You may recognize regressive self-talk, by catching yourself using old excuses. One reaction to the backslide is to stay oblivious and not consciously acknowledge it. Who you start to associate with gives clues. Some individuals are more likely to support and enable your old habits. You might subconsciously choose to have these enablers around during a regression, as they encourage your past behaviour. You know many ways to fool yourself and others if this is your aim.

Staying in contact with your newer peer group during a slip-up is riskier, as they may confront you about going backwards. As uncomfortable as the process of being caught while regressing is, timely feedback may lessen the slide or even prevent it altogether.

However, allowing your inner critic to be too harsh at this time may further the regression, so be truthful and take action, but also be kind to yourself, as you reclaim your gains.

Finding ways to measure and monitor a backslide with beliefs is tricky, but essential. Use the gestalt method and put your polarized views in chairs. Remember the steps. See if the reassigned piece understands its new job and remind it how to support you best.

Also, note the tone of voice of the old belief, as you speak. Does it sound like the old piece has grown and changed and needs a reboot?

Stress, uncertainty, a fuzzy path and lack of resolve may allow slippage back to old patterns. If there is a regression admit to it and do some remedial work.

Remember why you have chosen the new belief and reaffirm its importance.

Visualize what you must do to hold your ground and move forward. If you need a supportive community, doctor, therapist or natural health practitioner get them on your team!

Try dreamwork as a technique to decloak your inner riddles and backslides.

Do not get discouraged. The trick is to catch yourself.  Notice the circumstances that caused the feelings. Remind yourself of why you wish to be free and get back on track.

Genie Lesson # 85

Know Your Personal Rhythm

You need to recognize when you are burned out.  Have you been away from what nourishes you for too long? Backslides can happen because you are not taking the time to regenerate yourself. Find significant time to be in complete silence, walk in nature, dance to your favorite music, or whatever it is that repairs you. You must spend time in your own element, where you feel like yourself. You must do this often enough to keep yourself whole, sane and happy. Your employer, spouse and family will always have demands, but if you are out of your own rhythm you need to restore yourself, now!

Ask yourself, where do you feel most nurtured, soothed and whole?

How can you journey to that place, or obtain the feeling that regenerates you?

What journey, ritual, thought or behaviour might keep you anchored in your skin, in your daily life?

How do you keep this piece of yourself intact, listened to and healthy?